In Russia, bar walks into you

Let's take a break from my Onion-y headlines for a moment.

In July my GF and and I went on a cruise that left from and returned to Southampton. Upon our return to Southampton, we rented a car and drove to Stonehenge.

As you can see, this took us straight through Salisbury. We did not stop in Salisbury.

After visiting Stonehenge, we were hungry. We had planned to get fish & chips (it's England!) and I had scouted out a few places. We decided on Mitchell's Chippy.

First, let me say, this place was great. It is a real neighborhood place. Everything made burn-your-mouth fresh.
Second, we did not realize at the time that Salisbury was were the Novichok poisonings had occurred.
Third, we ARE tourists and we did not even know that there was a "famous cathedral" in Salisbury.

Trump: Dems moved Puerto Rico into hurricane's path

I'll get bored of this in a few more days.

New Apple Watch automatically orders you a Newer Apple Watch

Another Onion-type headline.

Erdogan names self as top adviser

Thought I'd try my hand at writing Onion-type headlines.

Productivity falls due to too many "moments of silence" being observed

If you define news as something you didn't know before, then, by definition, anniversaries are never news.

Trump in hot water due to Pecker

PSA - Do not Google the phrase "pecker flips".

Get it on with the bus

A succubus is a female demon that fucks sleeping men.
An incubus is a male demon that fucks sleeping women.
A Trumpubus is a presidential demon that fucks a sleeping public.