I'm Going Un-Postal

After two months of inactivity, I think it's finally time to close up shop.

Happy New Year!

I Love All Animals. They're Delicious!

I was so excited when I saw a deal on Endangered Species Chocolates. This would combine my three favorite things: deals, chocolate and eating!

Then I looked at the choices: cherry, blueberry, peanut butter?! When did those become endangered? I was hoping for polar bear or Siberian tiger or (dare I say it?) Northern Spotted Owl! What a disappointment.

It's Almost Like I'll Be On TV

In the "It's a Small World" category, I went to someone's surprise birthday party last weekend. AT the party was someone from Florida that the surprise-ee has known for something like 30 years. And readers of my blog (both of them) also kind of know this person.

Remember this post from last year? No? Blocked it out, huh? Well, the person I speak of is the inventor of that, uhm, invention. And he (his name is Floyd) will be on the TV show Shark Tank tonight!

Remember, you read about it here first; your home for dubious inventions!

Breastalyzer Test

A couple of little things, just to let people know I'm still alive.

First, there's an article about workers striking because some of their union brethren were fired for looking at Internet porn. I have two things to say about this. A) Unless you work in the porn industry you should not be looking at porn at work. B) Why on Earth are pizza makers part of the Technical, Engineering and Electrical Union?

Second is a product that, in my mind, would only be used by the most responsible of irresponsible moms. Breast alcohol test strips. That is not a typo; I did write "breast" not "breath". This is for nursing mothers who want to go out and get tanked but then they don't know how long to wait before breastfeeding their babies. With these handy strips, no more guesswork. If you're buying multiple boxes of 20's, you probably should give your baby up for adoption.

Let's Give'em A Hand

This weekend in NYC included dinner at Vatan (which is delicious but too much food for too much money, if that makes sense). If you go and can eat the whole battered/fried pepper that comes with the appetizer tray then you have my utmost respect.

After that, we moseyed on over to the Found Footage Festival which was hilarious! There are some clips on YouTube including this one.



And if you are NOT at work, the festival included parts of this one.
Did I mention this is not safe for work?
NSFW!

Update: I don't know why the embedded version of this did not work. But it is still NSFW!

Update 2: I completely forgot to include this photo of me and, uhm, yes, it is exactly what you think.

Here's The Buzz

Best Woot write-up in a while.

Sounds like Melissa’s playing electric football again. It’s great that my wife is becoming such a football fan, even if she only wants to play it by herself.

Chupabarro

Walking home today, I came to the usually dry creek. Today it was slowly flowing. I could either walk around or jump it.

It was about a 6 foot jump. I tested the landing area with a nearby stick. Solid. I can jump this, no problem.

I leap and as I do my plant foot slips, robbing me of all my forward momentum and landing me right in the middle of the f*cking creek. I pull my foot quick. Too quick for my elastic laces which can't overcome the suction of the mud. I have to reach in and pull my shoe out.

I get home and toss my socks in the garbage. They're too muddy to contemplate washing. I put the shoes outside to dry but I'm pretty sure that won't dry...in the rain.