If you're looking for the funniest stuff, I suggest starting with the Steve, Don't Eat It Homage and then the travel category. You're on your own with the older posts that have yet to be categorized.

Wednesday, May 06, 2009

You Will Not Become Rich Preventing The Camel Toe From Passing Through The Bikini

Just when I think I'm getting out...

I need a product that covers half of an ass. For example, because my company classifies the Cuchini as "adult material" I can only write a half-assed review of it, based on this Gizmodo post.

Anyway, as must be obvious, Cuchini is a combination of cooch and bikini (or maybe zucchini). My half-assed view is that it is a hard piece of leather that is inserted into a woman's...hey, don't get ahead of me here...is inserted into a woman's panties or bikini (or jeans if she's going "commando"). Kind of like a panty liner but instead of absorbing fluids, it absorbs lines/creases/crevices/cravasses (depending on a woman's age, sexual experience and whether her boyfriend is referred to as "soup can man" or not).

Unlike a panty liner, this thing does not breath (huh huh huh); it suffocates. You know the difference between the smell of feet that are in mesh sneakers versus those that are trapped in leather all day? I guess that's not an issue as anyone concerned about showing their puff daddy is probably already using some kind of nethers deodorant.

Now, attach a little motor with an offset weight and you've got yourself a product!

Hey sweetie, your phone is ringing.

Thanks to the Albaniac for this one!

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