If you're looking for the funniest stuff, I suggest starting with the Steve, Don't Eat It Homage and then the travel category. You're on your own with the older posts that have yet to be categorized.

Thursday, October 19, 2006

Foley Operators Make Weird Noises

From the feedback I get, it seems the posts people enjoy most are the ones where life sh*ts on my new shirt. With this in mind I bring you my travails of the past couple days with my crashed hard drive.

Sorry, I must cut that post short as the Foley story is too good to pass up. I take you live to the Island of Gozo...

[...] the priest said it wasn't abuse because Foley "seemed to like it."
We were just fondling.
It's not like I was IMing him or something.
"See abuse, it's a bad word, you know, because abuse, you abuse someone against his will. But it involved just spontaneousness, you know?"
Mr. Mackey, mkay, says fondling is bad, mkay. Like drugs, mkay. Drugs are bad, mkay.
"I would say that if I offended him, I am sorry, but to remember the good time we had together, you know?" he said. "And how really we enjoyed each other's company. And to let bygones be bygones. Don't keep dwelling on this thing, you know?"
Yes, remember the good times. Any time you need a friend. Good times. Not getting hassled, not getting hustled. Keeping your head above water, making a wave when you can. Temporary layoffs. Good times.

There is much, much more. I cannot quote it all. I close with the Vatican's response:
A Vatican spokesman said that if Foley's allegations are true, "we participate in the pain that this deplorable situation has caused."

"We trust in the competent ecclestial [sic] authorities to investigate and clarify the events that have been reported," said Father Federico Lombardi.

2 comments:

cluefairy said...

The priest's responses just make me ill. I'll probably be writing a post about it this weekend. Foley isn't his only victim. I'd bet money on it.

The irony of the Vatican saying that in light of their recent coverups obviously is lost on them.

talljay said...

The priest sounds the spokesman for NAMBLA. It's all just normal, good fun.

I love that Vatican only wants to "clarify" what happened.

The big question: Has Foley been holding this incident back for all these years so he could spring it when needed? Like a "Get out of jail free" card?