Intruder Alert

I don't see many commercials these days and I'm usually not paying much attention to those I do see. This morning was a bit different.

There was a commercial for Flomax. I didn't see it, but looked up at the end when they listed the side effects of "runny nose, dizziness and decrease in semen." I don't drink coffee, don't shower until I'm fed and was only mid-bowl when the commercial came on so not every neuron was firing yet. Until I looked it up, I was confusing Flomax (helps those with an enlarged prostate pee) with Flonase (allergy relief, I think). I would guess this is not something these drug companies would be happy about.

Imagine something like this:

You: Doc, I saw this commercial and I'm having all the symptoms they describe. I think I need some Flomax.
Doc: Really? Well, let's take a look. Drop your drawers. Lay on the table on your side and bring your knees to your chest.
You, somewhat confused but not wanting to argue with the doctor, comply. In the background you hear the snap of a latex glove then an odd "gloop" sound. Then, without warning, you are intruded.
You think "Jesus Mother of Mary and Joseph" (since you're Jewish you have no idea what you are saying). A tear trickles out of your eye. Suddenly, the violation ends.
Doc: Everything seems normal.
You (meekly): But I'm sneezing all the time and my nose won't stop running.
Doc: Ohhhhh. You meant Flonase. Let's have a look.
You: Uh, did you change your glove?

I was going to write about the "decrease in semen" side effect but I can't come up with anything besides Navy jokes.