If you're looking for the funniest stuff, I suggest starting with the Steve, Don't Eat It Homage and then the travel category. You're on your own with the older posts that have yet to be categorized.

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Have I Wasted Enough Time Yet?

It's 5am. I've been up since 3:30 with this f***ing Love, Reign O'er Me song running through my head like a freight train. How does this song end? Make it stop!

Crossword puzzle #2, version 2 (maybe I should call it 2.1 to make it seem like I wasted less manpower on it) is on its way to the NYTimes. I allow myself only a sliver of hope that it might find its way into newsprint. And by sliver I mean that it is about as likely as me getting this freaking song out of my head anytime soon.

It's 5:15am. Continuing to ramble, I was just thinking about those tests you take in middle/high school that tell you what field you should go into. I don't remember what mine said but it certainly wasn't "engineer". Those tests must not be very good because it's hard to imagine something I'd be better at.

Except maybe gigolo or Chippendale dancer.

Here's an abbreviated version of how a "real life" version of one of these tests would work.

  1. Do you like to play with fire?

    • Yes - go into firefighting

  2. Do you like to shoot people?

    • With a camera? - Try photography

    • With a gun? - Try the military or police

  3. Do you like to have sex with children?

    1. If Yes, are you religious?

      • Yes - Become a priest or minister.

      • No - Become a teacher or child care worker.

    2. If No, do you like to have sex with women?

      • Yes - Become a rock and roll star or an investment banker

      • No - Become an engineer or a mime


DeborahSmith said...

Speaking of which how is your dating life?

talljay said...

If it was good, I'd have something else to do at 5am.

DeborahSmith said...

Sleep right? :)

talljay said...