Help Not Wanted

Multimillion dollar company seeks CEO. We are currently poised for future growth and need only a charismatic leader with vision and ability to think in and out of the box.

Job Description: You will have to find the largest number on a Powerpoint slide while appearing to ponder the decision. Occasionally you will need to pick the second largest number explaining that "all our competitors will go after the largest number leaving the other market entirely to us!" Lots of glad handing and travel (via private jet) required. Additional random decision making will also be necessary.

Requirements: B.S. (and lots of it), perennial optimism, great teeth and an ability to lie through them, lack of accountability a must! Self-absorbency a plus! Maximum 10 handicap. Mysogony helpful but not required.