If you're looking for the funniest stuff, I suggest starting with the Steve, Don't Eat It Homage and then the travel category. You're on your own with the older posts that have yet to be categorized.

Thursday, May 04, 2006

Please Don't Pee On My Glasses

Yes, it's yet another bathroom story.

I'm in the bathroom brushing my teeth (more on that in a second) and I see, in the bathroom mirror, one, then another, guy walk by. Since I don't hear stalls closing, I assume they're at the urinals (of which there are two). If you're trying to form a mental picture (and I hope you are not), the bathroom layout has the sinks and urinals on the same wall, with a partition between them. A few seconds later, a third guy walks by. Apparently heading to a urinal, he stops when he sees they are occupied, then looks at the sink (where I am) then at the garbage can. The look he had on his face told me everything. He was eyeing potential backups! Had I not been there that guy might have actually peed in the sink. That's the look he had on his face. He started doing a little circular pacing waiting for an opening.

Back to my teeth. The only reason I'm brushing at work is that I have an afternoon dental appointment. It's a warm day today so I didn't wear a jacket. That means I've got no place to keep my sunglasses (and still remember them when I leave) except on a lanyard around my neck. I bend down to spit. As I do, my glasses go swinging forward, perfectly timed for me to cover them with an effluent of toothpaste, saliva and maybe a remnant or two from lunch at Wendy's. Grrr. I rinse them off and grab the floss.

After flossing, I need to spit again and, you guessed it, suddenly I need to clean my glasses again. Now that's just plain stupid.

1 comment:

Love Glasses said...

U can buy cheap glasses and pee on your glasses again and again!!